#Movies
Graham
Siskel and Ebert, Hah! I laugh! Those two dreary, lifeless clods could
have made millions had they only come to fisticuffs on occasion. Yeah,
beat the snot out of each other in a WWF-type affair at the end of each
program:
"Ebert you fat, bloated, wasted mass of quivering jelly *WHAP* 'Jurassic
Park' was only a tawdry series of special effects *PILE DRIVER* strung
together in what is only vaguely recognizable *KNEE TO THE GROIN* as a
plot!"
Ebert comes off the turnbuckle, smashing Siskel beneath him. Crowd goes
wild as blood rivulets seep from beneath Rogers flab and begin to pool.
"Gene, I told you that 'JP' was a comment on the morality of playing God
utilizing modern technology!"
Siskel is carried away in a garbage baggie…
-Sam
A Man Barely Alive