CompuServe Messages

Alec: Well, let's see, I guess telling you that it's just plain awesome isn't going to cut it, right? <grin> So what we need is a Jeff's Top Ten Reasons To Buy Smacker List: 10) It really does what I say it does! Check out our press release to get a feature list, and then believe it. A customer from Australia left a message on our answering machine just to say how happy he was with the product – on his dime! 9) Smacker is more fun to say than MPEG. For example, chant "Smack-Attack", instead of "Shaq-Attack" during NBA playoff games. 8) Smacker comes with a 30-day money-back guarantee, so if you don't think it's cool, just send it back. 7) By Smacking all your flics, you create more hard disk space for games. 6) We know what we're doing. We are an Autodesk multimedia dealer and have used Animator and 3D Studio since they were released. We have been hired to produce both animations (for HP) and complete games (MS Golf), so we actually use Autodesk's stuff for the same kind of work that you probably do. I wrote Smacker as tool that I could use, so, hopefully, you will benefit from the same features that I needed. 5) If you're a primatologist, you can use the phrase "Smacking the monkey" without being accused of sexual harassment. 4) If you have a new feature idea or a question about Smacker, you can actually talk to someone who can make it happen – me. I hang out here, and you can almost always reach me at 801-322-4300 during the day. This is a big deal – imagine the difference in the Yost products had they not been here to help people and receive new ideas. 3) It breaks the 2 to 1 barrier – no wait, that's Stacker. Smacker breaks the 5 to 1 barrier – yeah, that's it. 2) Yup, $295.00 is a lot of money. But, if someone else sold it, I would still buy it – it does exactly what I need a compression tool to do. 1) And the number one reason to buy Smacker is: after offending Stac, primatologists, Dave Letterman, NBC, and the MPEG people with this list – our legal department will need the funds! P.S. Oh yeah, you don't have to reformat your hard drive and modems haven't yet caused any compatibility problems. <grin>